You Do You, Because Nobody Does You Better Than You

I've always wanted to meet myself from someone else’s point of view. I've often wondered how people describe me to those who have never met me. What do they say? What first impression do I leave on people?

But then I wonder: why do we care so much what other people think? Why do the opinions of those who hold no significance in our lives matter so much?

Since entering high school, my mentality has changed a bit. It now rests firmly at the following:

You're still going to get criticized, so you might as well do whatever you want.

I've learned something else along the way:

Never compare yourself to anyone. You'll be miserable forever.

Butterflies can't see their wings. They can't see how beautiful they are, but everyone else can. People are like that.

It doesn't make sense to call ourselves ugly, because we don't really see ourselves. We don't see ourselves sleeping in bed, curled up and silent, with chests rising and falling to our own rhythm. We don't see ourselves reading a book, eyes fluttering and glowing. You don't see yourself looking at someone with love and care inside your heart. There's no mirror in your way when you're laughing and smiling and happiness is leaking out of you. 

You have only seen yourself two times: in pictures and looking at your reflection in the mirror. You don't get to see the way your eyes light up when you talk about something you love, and you can never see how beautiful you look when you smile. It's really kinda sad that you never actually see yourself the way other people do. You would know exactly how beautiful you are if you saw yourself in the moments where you are truly yourself.

So love yourself. Appreciate your body the way that it is. Tell yourself that you're beautiful everyday.

It's important.

The first step to loving yourself is to accept your flaws. Once you accept your flaws, nobody can use them against you.

"Once you’re comfortable with yourself and accept yourself nothing else matters." ~Jack Barakat

We tumbled headfirst into this world. all arms and legs moving everywhere, looking everywhere. And slowly but surely, bit by bit, you became you. Don't let people (especially those who don't matter in your life) get to you. Don't change yourself to make anybody happy. Keep company that accepts the real you. Your reputation in high school doesn't matter once you graduate anyways so why spend 4 years trying to impress people you'll never see again? Who cares what they think? If they don't like who you are, then honestly, they aren't worth the energy or time. The people who talk behind your back are behind you for a reason. Don't hide your true self to impress anybody. It's not worth it.

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." ~Oscar Wilde

And you know those oh-so-fake people that we all have a passionate disliking for? Don't be one of them. Don't try so hard to fit in that you lose who you really are. If you have to try that hard, maybe you don't really belong there. Believe you me, you belong somewhere, just maybe not there. You'll know where you truly belong, and who you truly are, because you won't have to work for it; it will simply fall into place.

"Be real, because a mask only fools people on the outside. Pretending to be someone you're no takes a toll on the real you, and the real you is more important that anyone else." ~Alex Gaskarth

 At the same time you are embracing your you-ness for all that it is, don't forget to stay humble, because at the end of the day, no matter how big your house is, how recent your car is, how full your bank account is, our graves will all be the same size.

Be who you want to be and do whatever it takes to get there!

Thoughts During Crisis

July 27, 2012

I never did think that a wildfire could affect me or my family. Never have I ever though about having to pack up and be ready to leave at a moment's notice. How am I supposed to look around at my life and my home and decide what is “important enough” to take with me? How can I be expected to leave behind things that I have lived with all my life?

All the things that you hear during a time like this, you don't know what is true and what isn't. Being in this situation really puts things into perspective. You see very quickly what things are most important to you. You suddenly become extremely attached to everything you have. As you scroll through pictures of houses ablaze, and flames standing 30 feet tall, and Facebook statuses about all the prayers people are sending, you see the occasional glimmer of happiness from somebody not part of the group.

They talk about dance recitals and concerts, Hawaiian vacations, and what movie they want to see. The famous crowd worries about things like tour dates, photo shoots, and book releases. You stop and wonder: How can they be so oblivious? And that's when you realize that only a few days ago, you were one of those people. You were moving on with your life. The closest you ever were to a disaster was that action movie you saw last week. You didn't worry because you didn't have to.

I try to go through my day as I usually would, but it feels strange. As I shuffle through my music, I can't help but feel something that is almost guilt. It seems like your normal life is gone. Obsolete.

And it is. In the course of a few days, your life has been turned upside down, and nothing is as it was.

***this was written several years ago, during the Waldo Canyon Fire.***

Mortality

This topic has a bit of a strange origin. As we do, my friends and I were talking, and a topic came up: What if you were allergic to air? Of course this seems ridiculous, right? Maybe not.

What if Oxygen is actually toxic, and it's slowly poisoning us?

Upon bringing this up later to a friend, I received this response:

"Technically anything elemental in this world is toxic, but the human body just needs it... in a way being alive also means being "high"."

At quite a young age (perhaps around 7 or 8) I somehow came to the realization that, technically, from the moment a person is conceived (that is to say, the sperm meets the egg) they begin the process of dying. There is somewhat of a (for lack of a better word) misconception that we don't start dying until we are old or contract a terminal disease. But I disagree. From before we are even introduced to this world, we are dying. As soon as we start living, we are dying.
In the words of my friend:

"Your birth and death are literally the same thing."

That's a scary thought, but it's one that should be the proverbial kick in the pants that some people need to actually make something of their life. Some people may refer to this phenomenon as "YOLO" (now, I have some things to say about YOLO, but that's for another post). Despite whatever controversy exists over YOLO, the concept is correct. You do, in fact, only live one time. And you never know when your one life is going to end. Every year you pass your birthday and know that you were born that day, but every year you also pass your death day and have no clue.

These words from my step-mom's father couldn't be more true:

"The only thing you need to die, is to be alive."

Humans are fragile. The evidence is in the fact that something that we need as much as Oxygen potentially has the power to kill us.


Weigh in on this in the comments. I'd like to know your thoughts :)

Fate

There is something that I feel I should report to the world, despite the depressing morbidity of it all.

I've recently been doing quite a lot of thinking and had a bit of what one might call a premonition. This premonition is as follows:

We are each just a decaying organism that’s born to die in a society run by money that we can’t escape from. We are trapped in a rotting body on a dying planet in a mysterious dimension controlled by an unknown force.

This "unknown force" is sometimes known as "fate". Apparently fate controls everything, right? But wouldn't you rather have control over your own life? In discussing this matter with my best friend, he brought about these ever so wise words:

"True, Fate is a cruel monster. However, that doesn't stop anyone from taking their path. You see life controls fate, fate controls life, we are fate."

Does this mean that it's a vicious cycle that we are inevitably trapped in with no chance of breaking away from the mainstream current that destiny has chosen for us?

The simple answer to this is yes and no. We can control our own decisions. We can manipulate certain parts of the world around us. But on the other hand, we can't control other people, and a majority of the things that happen in the world are out of our control.

And then of course we have the religious aspect of fate. Fate is something that is often linked to God or other such "higher beings". It is an unseeable force that controls all of our actions. To some people this is comforting. The belief that there is somebody who is "all knowing" watching over us and ensuring that we follow our "set path" gives some people a sense of security.

But as I asked before, wouldn't you rather have that control? Does it scare you that you, essentially, have no control over your own life, good or bad? Do you want that control? Do want the responsibility associated with running a life, or are you happy to leave it to somebody else? Does this unknown higher being only control the fates of those who allow Him to do so?

Weigh in on this in the comments. I'd like to know your thoughts :)

***My intent with this post is not to offend anybody or their religion. I an simply relaying thoughts that I've had and expressing my opinion***